Sunday, 1 March 2009

How to Avoid Housework

Okay, so I'm on vacation. It's spring break for my son. My husband is home this week. He does contract work, and the contract ended this past Friday. I'm happy all three of us are together for the week, but I know this means I have to clean the house. I was planning on it anyway - in my own time, which is slow to never. I thought I'd kick start my ass by telling my friend Karen she can bring her kids over on Wednesday and Thursday, as she's stuck for a sitter. This way, Francis wins by having his friends over, and I have no choice but to clean.

I'm a pressure cleaner. I usually wait until the last minute and whirl through everything, putting myself in panic mode. This worked when I was younger, and when I had an apartment. Now, I ask myself why I put myself through all this pressure and stress, and I have a much larger cleaning area.

So here I am thinking about cleaning, but not doing anything - yet. My husband just came in and stated he thought I had done the dishes by now. I am used to his sarcasm. And to those of you who read this and think why doesn't he do them, he does help out some around the house. Sometimes it's help in creating the mess, sometimes it's in cleaning it up. He came up with a great idea - once we fixed dinner, we would clean up any pots/pans/dishes that don't go in the dishwasher when we're done eating. We follow it once in a while. Sometimes it takes a couple of days.

Other than posting on a blog, what are the other ways to waste time before reluctantly cleaning up after 3 people? (Yes, I am aware supermoms out there have more children and much busier agendas than I and still manage to keep a house clean. I have yet to encounter any drug to make me that efficient.)

  • Play Mario Kart - the time sucker of all time suckers.
  • Surf the net.
  • Go through all your old emails and see what you can toss.
  • Do your taxes (actually, it does help to have a clean work environment for this because you'll have your papers all over the place anyway).
  • Read the book you've put aside for so long.
  • Watch tv. It especially helps if there's a marathon of The Hills going on. Yes, theoretically you could still clean while it's on, but that show in particular has a zombifying effect (on  me anyway).
  • Play outside.
  • Go through old pictures and see which ones you'd like to scan and post on facebook.
  • Think of other things to do while blogging so you don't have to face the inevitable.

I have often wondered why I loathe cleaning. If I'm at someone else's house, I have zero problems helping out and picking up after myself and/or my own. When I was young (very young) it was up to me and my brother to keep everything clean. My mother worked and when she came home, she expected the kitchen and living room to be spotless. If it wasn't, we were spanked (this was back in the '60s, folks). That could be part of it. I do remember thinking my first night in my first apartment that I can do whatever I want, whenever I want. I do also remember thinking to myself more than a few times, why bother? It's just going to get messy again anyway. But at least in an apartment, the whole place was clean in less than a day, and I felt really good afterwards.

In this house? Five minutes after washing the floor, it's usually dirty (we live in the country). While cleaning up I become easily dejected because of the obvious lack of storage space. This is an old house, 100 years old. People may think it's quaint. Believe me, you get tired of squeaking floorboards everywhere, cracks where there were no cracks before, and zero storage space. This house was handed down to my husband from his father and from his father before him. My husband is the youngest of 9 children. We were just marvelling the other night how 11 people could live in this house before the kitchen extension was built. Our bathroom used to be the kitchen and our bedroom closet, believe or not, was the bathroom. Since this house is multi-generational, we have 4 generations of crap (and I do mean crap - the antiques were taken by a sister-in-law and sold off behind the parents back - but she's another story). Combine that with a husband who does not like to throw anything out, and that spells a whole lotta junk. And to be honest, for 3 people, we have far too much junk.

So I guess my reasons for being so resistant to housework are psychological trauma from my youth (pfff), laziness, lack of storage, and oh, laziness. I often wonder if I did have the storage, would we be more tidy? I think my son would be, he seems to have a natural ability to clean up. I would like to think his parents would be the same.

After all this, I will tell you something strange about myself - when I see ads on tv for new cleaning products, I feel a strong need to buy them. My favourite cleaning product is Lysol wipes. I LOVE them. Love them love them love them. Would I use Lysol as a douche? Hell no. But the spray does get rid of bad odours fast (much better than Febreeze) - no, I'm not talking about my lady business area, and the wipes can wipe down anything. If they would make Swiffer-sized sheets, I'd wash the floor with them.

Okay, now I feel inspired enough to tackle the kitchen. Thank you for reading about me working 
out my issues.

No comments:

Post a Comment