I may never be lonely being alone ...

But I sure do feel lonely when I have to beg or coerce my own family to do something with me.

One of the reasons why I wanted to have my own family was to be able to go out and do things with them. I naïvely thought it would be natural to want to go out together and enjoy that time with each other.

Instead, I seem to have the type of marriage I least wanted to have - the wife wants to go out, or be with friends and family, yet the husband doesn't want any part of it.

I remember reading once that polygamy was the norm in Tibet - in the favour of women.

I would like to have multiple husbands. One who can fix things around the house, (at least) one who is great in bed, one who likes to go out to parties, one who likes to go out and do something, one who I can talk to about anything and everything and not feel judged, one who accepts me for me, one who seems like a real badass but has a heart of gold, one who plays an instrument (if music be the food of love, play on), one who loves to play games (not mind games), one who puts his family first.

Of course, all would have to be good fathers. Be positive role models. All of them would have to love me, and I them.

Can I get all that in one man? No. But teach a dog how to use a wrench and play an instrument, I can get myself a vibrator and not bother with men anymore! Ba dum bum.

But I would still have to deal with his shit. Ah, life. It can never be perfect, can it.